Tuesday

Looking back:
I was looking for a file for someone in some of my external storage this morning, and came across these photos from almost exactly a year ago. This was just before Q's second cleft surgery, so her upper lip was only partially attached. She was still a little uncertain, a little unsteady, a little lost.
But turn her upside-down and tickle her belly, and that smile would emerge...that smile that lit up our world the very first time we saw it, and held so much promise for the future.

There were all sorts of concerns when we first considered adopting a child with a lifetime of surgical needs. So many cautions and warnings and doubts from those around us. What nobody thought to warn us about was the one thing that we encounter now every single day: the perilous, dizzying depths of that love for a child, the overwhelming joy that she brings to every moment, and the degrees by which, in equal proportion, the fragile confines of the heart become even more thin-skinned, more vulnerable, and more achingly translucent.

7 comments:

Mlle Paradis said...

INCREDIBLE how she's grown. What a year you have all had!

Yanyan said...

Touched by your post, Love the picture when you held Qiu Qiu upside down. She is lucky to have your love and she is amazing and beautiful to bring all the love to your life. Glad to know you through the blog

Kenza said...

I am very touched by your words. And I understand fully that depth you talk about --that joy mixed with that slight shudder as you realize that someone is so fully dependent on you, someone you love beyond compare and someone who gives you smiles just because. Thank you for this, you have brightened my morning as you always do. As I mention in the post today, God (or take anything you want that is what makes us more than what we are) reflects itself in beauty and makes itself known through love.

Angie Muresan said...

This post is so beautiful. It brought tears to my eyes to read of the love you have for your daughter.

Stacie said...

you so perfectly describe the vulnerability of being a mother(a good mother). It is impossible to prepare for.

FDChief said...

Lovely post. I hope that little Q has filled that heart with her love so that it glows from within like a candle in a dark window.

Jeanne-ming Brantingham said...

oh yes little darlings.